14 Comments

With Colors Like These (Flash Fiction)

Thank you, Priceless Joy, for hosting Flash Fiction for Aspiring Writers, and thank you, Phylor, for providing the inspiring photo prompt this week. If you haven’t heard of or joined this challenge, please go check out PJ’s blog for more details and entertaining entries. You won’t regret it.

~*~

Now, to the story:

~*~

“Oh, wow, Mommy . . . orange, and yellow, and red. They’re everywhere!” He tugs away from her hand and cannon balls into a big pile.

She laughs and settles down by the shed in their backyard. A gust of wind brushes past, and she leans her face into it, closing her eyes, taking it all in. Especially the rustling sounds of her son leaping and diving into the leaves.

“Mommy! The colors are making me so hungry. I’m starving!”

She smirks and stretches her legs on the grass, crossing her ankles. “Oh, really? It’s the colors’ fault?”

“Yes!” He attacks another big pile. “Daddy always says my eyes get hungry before my tummy does.”

That makes her laugh. Again.

“Mommy?” He pauses his jumping.

“Mhmm?”

“Do you still get hungry?”

She furrows her eyebrows. “Of course.”

“But… but you can’t see anything.”

She gets quiet and stays quiet for a long moment. He’s just a kid. A kid who starts stomping and crushing the leaves, less happy, more angry now. He doesn’t understand why her pale eyes can’t see anymore. No matter how many times she tries to explain.

“Yes, baby—” Her voice cracks. “I still get hungry.”

14 comments on “With Colors Like These (Flash Fiction)

  1. I loved this story! Very sad at the end to find out she is blind. The story really drew me into it and I really enjoyed reading it. Well done!

    Like

  2. Lovely twist at the end. So sad that she can’t see the colours her kid is describing, but happy that she is still living her life and has him to look after her in years to come. Nice one.

    Like

  3. Oh no Izzy, I did not see that end coming.
    Kids can be a blessing and a reminder of ghosts better left buried.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Awww… heartbreakingly beautiful.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. The honesty in this exchange was well done. Not overly done –
    Ellespeth

    Liked by 1 person

  6. oh dear! that twist hits the heart hard. yet sooooo beautiful!

    Like

  7. the innocence of a child brings us face to face with our reality and what we shall do with it….love that the story id=s not ll roses and kisses bt still gives me a good feeling at the end…nice!

    Liked by 1 person

  8. That’s very sad about her eyes. I suppose to a child it might be confusing. He doesn’t know what effects what and what not having sight or poor fight means. Well written.

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Beautifully described, Izzy. The twist was totally unexpected. Having her closing her eyes was a great red herring – I assumed the lack of visual description was because she wasn’t looking, not because she couldn’t see. Very nicely done. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  10. Such a beautiful story Izzy and so beautifully told..

    Liked by 1 person

  11. A wonderful story of a mom enjoying a her day with her child and trying to make things normal for him even though she could not enjoy the colors as he did. There are many things that children do not understand when they can see, but other people can not. I read the book Touching The Rock by John M. Hull and he explains how his life was being blind, and helping to raise his children. There are many things I was already aware of, but many that never crossed my mind….especially the way children view a person that is blind. It is a really wonderful book…recommended to me by one of my sisters that is going blind.

    Liked by 2 people

  12. A very endearing scene, Izzy. I love the image of the little boy frolicking in the leaves. It’s a vivid and colourful scene, which makes the sudden reference to the mother’s blindness all the more poignant. I also like the way the child’s remark about his eyes getting hungry before his stomach links to her blindness. Very well written.

    Like

  13. The innocence of children and the fortitude of moms – well done

    Liked by 2 people

  14. Oh my. I wasn’t expecting that closure. Sometimes children are so endearing in their innocence.

    Liked by 2 people

Leave a comment